worst. birthday. ever.

Procrastination, part 3

Why, when I'm at work on the weekend (away from my fam., with the precious minutes ticking by), is it impossible for me to accomplish any work before my checkbook is balanced, my facebook status is updated, and I've written this blog? It's ridiculous, but becoming a trend. I'm kinda bitter I'm here on 4th of July weekend, but then remind myself that I don't really like the 4th of July anyway. Correction--I like the fireworks, grilling, and a day off. I do not like jingoism.

Anyway, here I am. I am going to consider this blog post done so that I can do some real work now. . .

Vacations and Camping (and Mono???)

During the faux breather that I decided to give myself at work over the last month, Peter and Mira and I had some very nice adventures. We went to visit relatives and friends around the southeast; had a fun excursion to the zoo; finished up Mira's baby music class; celebrated Mother's Day in a way that was festive rather than disasterous; celebrated our neighbor's graduation from high school; and, successfully camped outside, in a tent, for one night! Overall, May was a very good month! So, why is it that at the end of it I have a sore throat that's been w/me for 10 days and spent the night puking just 36 hrs. ago??? A friend suggested to me today that maybe I have mono. . . eeeek!

After a quick and very scientific review of the relevant diagnostic literature (WebMD, MayoCliniconline, YouronlineHealth--I am nothing if not a scientist), I confirmed the diagnosis--swollen lymph nodes, check; sore throat persisting for many days, check; fatigue, CHECK!; headaches, check; nightsweats, check. . . . hmm. I don't seem to have the inflamed spleen thing, but that seemed minor. The problem, though, is that LAST month was for resting and THIS month is for working--the universe and my body did not seem to get these messages. I am hopeful that I am just being a hypochondriac and that the web diagnostic tools are just like "Where There is No Doctor" of my Peace Corps days (which had me once diagnosing myself with yellow fever, typhoid, and HIV), except on warp speed. Fingers crossed! I have briefs to write!

[images from top to bottom: Mira and her buddy Amelia bounce on the air mattress; Mira contemplates the beach; Mira enjoying the zoo; Mira and Sam share a snack; Easy Rider; Family after a dip in the Lake; Mira and Mama check out a fountain in Charlotte]

Procrastination

As I write this, I should be writing something for work, but then again, it seems like I should always be writing something for work these days. I have never been busier as a lawyer than I have been since I came back from maternity leave. In some ways, it is exhilarating to be doing work that I find so compelling and to feel like I am really maturing as a lawyer. In other ways, I'm really sad that that is happening during Mira's babyhood. Peter and I are constantly engaged in "finding the right balance" and I have come to suspect that we may always be doing that particular two-step.


All of this is to say, though, that I do feel incredibly lucky to be here in GA, so close to my family, with a beautiful daughter, work that is meaningful and a husband who pitches in. This may sound sappy, but I mean it. Two things that being a lawyer has really taught me are: that it could always be so much worse; and, there but for the grace of God go I. Wow. This really isn't a lighthearted blog post at all! Sorry, readers. Guess I'm not feeling all that lighthearted, despite the glass of red wine I sat down with (or maybe because of. . .). Funny thing is, I didn't notice that I was feeling kinda morose until I started writing.

In happier news, today DEA agents marched in to GA's death row prison and seized the state's illegally obtained supply of lethal injection drugs. That was also a funny sentence to write! But, I was seriously excited by this news--that must have been quite a scene! The other news is that Peter is out tonight w/ a buddy having a dad's night out. I am so glad for him! I feel like the focus of the last year has been a lot on my mental health and sanity, but he also has mental health needs and feels the attendant stresses (along w/ the joys, of which there are plenty) of caring for a little being.

Pictures are: Mira knows what she'd like to order; girls in the snow; Mira is one!; Over-the-shoulder-Mira.

October Eve

Pictures top to bottom: Daddy & daughter dance; Nuzzle; "Uncle Woody, is Uncle Matt crazy?;" MorMor's Joy; In the Kitchen; Eyes!; Curled up on Daddy; MorMor & PapPap; Prune Facial; Sparkly Girl!

October is *almost* upon us again, which means I'm getting ready to flip the calendar to mark the beginning of my 36th year on the planet. Aaagh! 35 feels distinctly older than 34, so that is strange and it's hard to believe that I am that squarely an adult. On the other hand, and excepting the introduction of Mira into the world, this past year has been a little bit rough for me and I think I'll be happy to see it on its way.

I am looking forward to returning to normalcy this year. I told Peter yesterday that I haven't had a "normal" life for at least the last 10 months. I feel it rounding the bend, though. We are through the first rough month of me-back-to-work and Mira-to-daycare; I am almost done with the huge brief that's been hanging over my head since maternity leave; I am no longer pregnant; my individual therapist and my shrink have discharged me; I've stopped acupuncture; and, one of these days I'll repaint my toenails (which are sad and very neglected). I have even begun to think some of reading or cooking something. . .

In addition to my birthday and the end of briefing hell, October brings many other good things. 1) Pumpkins--so orange and happy, even when they have not been carved as jack o' lanterns; 2) Crispy fall leaves and crispy fall weather--like snow falling, but more beautiful and not as cold. For those of you non-southerners who doubt that Atlanta can ever be crispy, you'll just have to come visit us and find out! 3) The beginning of festival season--My birthday is the beginning of an almost 5 month cycle in Peter's and my collective life that encompasses my day, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas, New Year's, *Mira's Birthday!!!*, Peter's birthday, our dating anniversary, and Valentine's Day--woohoo! 4) Squash weather, soup weather, apple weather; 5) Boot, sweater and jeans weather; 6) Mira in a cute ladybug costume!!!!

Okay, back to the brief. . .just a few more days and then October will be here. Whee!